Quotes
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- Tracy Jordan: Here's some advice I wish I woulda got when I was your age.Live every week like it's Shark Week.
- Dr. Leo Spaceman: Erectile dysfunction: it's not just a dog problem anymore.
- Kenneth Parcell: It's like my heart is trying to hug my brain!
- Liz Lemon: (singing) I'm a star! I'm on top! Somebody bring me some ham!
- (repeated line) Pete: Yes, Hornberger!
- Tracy Jordan: Liz Lemon! I can't believe they put what you said in the paper. Liz Lemon: Shh! How do you know about that? (Liz looks at Tracy's newspaper) Liz Lemon: This is a "Cathy" cartoon. Tracy Jordan: Yeah, that cartoon copied exactly what you said the other day. Liz Lemon: (Flashback to Liz) Chocolate! Chocolate! Chocolate! Aack!
- Jack: I like you. You have the boldness of a much younger woman.
- Jenna Maroney: Do you need a sex tape release? Because I've got a weird one. It's night vision and you can see that his buddy is robbing me.
- Jack: Never go with a hippie to a second location.
- Jenna Maroney: You look like that flashcard they told me means sadness.
- Tracy Jordan: I'm whipped! Angie got me up at 7:30 today. Did you know that in the morning, they have food, TV, almost everything. It's pretty good.
- Tracy Jordan: I am a Jedi! I am a Jedi! I am a Jedi!
- Dr. Leo Spaceman: If you want the shot... you're going to have to dance for it.
- Tracy Jordan: Stop eating people's old french fries, pigeon! Have some self respect! Don't you know you can fly?
- Colleen Donaghy: Tell him that his mother's here. And she loves him. But not in a queer way.
- (repeated line) Liz Lemon: I want to go to there.
- Abby Flynn: I'm a very sexy baby.
- Tracy Jordan: What did I tell you was the secret to having a good marriage and keeping it together, Kenneth? Kenneth Parcell: Be a good listener, a giver of gifts and work that va-jay-jay.
- Liz Lemon: Why are you wearing a tux? Jack: It's after 6 o'clock Lemon. What am I, a farmer?
- (repeated line) Dennis Duffy: Hey dummy.
- (repeated line) Liz Lemon: What the what?
- Jack: Factories provide three things this country desperately needs: jobs, pride, and material for Bruce Springsteen songs.
- Liz Lemon: (singing) Workin' on my night cheese!
- Kenneth Parcell: Science was my most favorite subject, especially the Old Testament.
